Saintperle

4/5/05

Regarding John Paul the Second

And what?

Saint Peter rubs his hands and says, "I've been waiting to do this for a long time." Turns to God and gives a long, drawn out (bad) Ed McMahon impression and says,
"Heeeeere's Johnny."

(Of course, being a saint, he then has to admit he'd practiced when Mr. Carson left the earthly plane just a short while back.)

That is, of course, that is if there IS a Heaven. Or a Hell. Or Saint Peter. Or a God. It doesn't have to be literal. When you say, "A man walks into a bar..." as a joke windup, there doesn't have to be a real bar.

As to the blasphemy implied, hey, it's not part of the right wing Christ-mongering industry, but trust me -- God loves Atheists.

Back to the Pope (of Rome -- there are others, or didn't you know).
To be The Pope is to be -- by definition -- the consummate company man.
THE MAN. That's the job. So nitpicking any perceived secular shortcomings of the late great Mr. Second is too easy, too mean-spirited, even for me.

For someone like me, being born Jewish while Pisspot Pius XII was strutting his stuff was to learn to run when mentally-deficient kids with crucifixes clustered around and swung fists and yelled "Faddah sez you killed Jesus!"

So I don't consider it to have been out of line, when Pope Piss died, for my father to sing "Ding-Dong, The Pope is Dead."

Actually, he didn't -- I made that up. What he did say was "Good. That Nazi-kissing sonofabitch can go straight to Hell."

Getting back to eulogizing the Big Noise from Gdansk, it means a lot when a company man stands up and kicks 1000 years of murderous finger-pointing tradition on its ass and says, "Oh, by the way, the Jews didn't kill Christ -- and, you know, a BIG apology is in order."

It took some major balls. (Yeah, yeah, I know, since he wasn't using them...) Real balls.

Consider this: he KNEW that the reason he got to be Mr. Second was because the guys in the Shadows had poisoned Mr. First And they didn't even give him the standard 90 day tryout.

So ok, too bad he didn't do anything about changing some rules around the "No Girls Allowed" Clubhouse. Because he seemed to spot nasty injustice in a lot of other places.

I have nothing bad to say about this man. I would like to remind anyone who reads this, though, that when HE said "Culture of Life," it excluded wars and death penalties, but emphatically included caring for the sick and the old and the poor.

So then how is it that when this man's name passes through George Bush's lips, even in praise, it somehow seems to shit on his memory?

One of them thar mysteries, I guess.

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